(Or, why I’m not being a book snob anymore.)
True life: I used to be a pick-me reader. This is a common occurrence amongst AP classes and English majors. Somewhere along the way, the kids seen as gifted because they devour books they adore stop picking up books they enjoy in favor of what they think they should be reading. They never pick up the popular, fun books that got them into reading. Let them be seen reading Infinite Jest or let them not be seen at all! Then they make it through college or whatever and gifted-kid-burnout inevitably shows its face and they realize that while making a stink about all the popular genres that aren’t “real” literature, they haven’t finished a book in a year. In deciding what I was “too good” to read, I essentially stopped reading altogether. When I did read, it was so slowly and with so little time dedicated to it that I rarely got back into that reading flow. Sound familiar?
My first bout of bookstagram, I was mostly still a version of this. I was in an MFA reading hundreds of short story collections and classics, in the trenches with my own writing. I had the idea that I would share the books I was interested in even though the space was widely used to share more popular fiction, and I did and it was fairly enjoyable! But I was just sharing what I was reading, which was just what I had to read, and eventually the gifted-kid-burnout found me there, too.
The first book I read post-MFA was Midnight Sun. I consumed it in a weekend with a ferocity I hadn’t seen in myself in decades. It was the kind of reading fever dream of middle school me closed up in my bedroom on a Saturday with two A Series of Unfortunate Events books that I’d demolish by nightfall. Of reading Bridge to Terabithia under my desk because I got scolded for reading ahead. And, even better, the book had just come out, so reading it had the same nostalgic hysteria of the early Twilight days! Suddenly, we’re all rewatching the movies. We’re all rereading the series. It’s a veritable sleepover of girlhood magic.
The same thing happened with A Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes andThe Hunger Games renaissance that brought on. The experience made me so wistful for the simple joy of reading a great series and talking about nothing else for 7-10 business years! ABOSAS was my gateway drug to the first thing that’s felt like reading as a child–I entered my Sarah J. Maas-iverse phase. I will never recover. I used to say I wasn’t into fantasy, as though my whole childhood never happened. I discovered Emily Henry around the same time and my heart soared! I used to say I didn’t really read romance, as though I didn’t spend my nights in high school exchanging tear-stained Nicholas Sparks novels with my friends. The love for the books that got us started doesn’t go away! If anything, the feeling becomes more precious because you can remember how it felt. I love seeing a girl on a plane reading ACOTAR and leaning over to ask how she’s liking it. I love scrolling through booktok curated just for me and commenting on the posts of strangers and saving recommendations I would never normally read.
So I think it’s not just the fast paced, easy reading experience (although it’s certainly that). It’s the community! The hyperfixation! The this-book-is-my-personality-now experience, and that it can be shared! I forgot how fun it is to be a part of the reading zeitgeist. I forgot that I am, to my core, fangirl trash. In the words of my fangirl guru, Hallie from The Common Room shop, “I was put on this Earth to love things.”
I think it’s true! Loving things loudly comes easily to me. I have a talent for enjoying myself. At first, it was hard to balance this quality with the critical side that comes with studying the written word. Sometimes, the writing is… I used to say “bad.” But I said “bad” because I meant “and I’m better for noticing!” Not so good professors will teach you this and tell you you’re “developing taste.” But you come to texts for different reasons, just like the authors create them with different goals. When I remembered I could simply enjoy things, life opened back up a little bit. And when I see a student reading (PRAISE BE), I want them to tell me about why they love it. Sometimes I’ll even add it to my tbr so I can talk to them about it. I even read a Colleen Hoover book! And you know what?! If they’re reading ANYTHING these days, I will support that in any way I can. It was so fun to be able to share that with them. I want them to remember that they had instructors who cheered them on for reading for the sake of reading, not criticized their tastes.
So anyway, as you may have seen last week, I got back on Bookstagram just in time to document the end of my Throne of Glass journey and get to House of Flame and Shadow (hopefully without spoilers). My romantasy phase is alive and well. Being able to gush with bookish friends new and old made me want to see what else everyone is reading so I can joining those conversations, too. And you know what? I am CONSUMED with thoughts of books. While it used to occur to me to make time to read maybe once a week, I find myself reaching for books all throughout the day. It’s like a muscle I let atrophy, and now it’s getting stronger with practice. I walked through the contemporary romance section of Target the other day. I’m embarrassed to say that there was a time when I would have rolled my eyes at the cutesy covers and tropes. But there was also a time when I would have gone absolutely feral in that section, not worried about what it said about me. This time, I saw tons of romance titles that I’d added to my TBR after seeing people gush about them online. It didn’t once cross my mind to worry if I thought they would be “good.” Books are not moral. READING IS GOOD.
So if any of this resonates with you, tell the withered old crone inside that your mind deserves to play! Here are some rapid fire, out of context recommendations of some books I haven’t read yet, but plan to. Follow along on the resurrected bookstagram for recs, reviews, and bookish life!
TabithaTypes 